


Birthdays and Wishes

by asphaltcowgrrl



Series: 2019 August Rush Drabbles [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-09
Updated: 2019-08-09
Packaged: 2020-08-13 23:01:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20182150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asphaltcowgrrl/pseuds/asphaltcowgrrl
Summary: It’s John Winchester’s birthday and Dean’s feeling a little down.





	Birthdays and Wishes

“Dean.”

It was one word, a simple word, his name, and yet it said so much. His father had given him that name, shouted it in anger, occasionally said it laced with pride. It was a part of who he was. 

“Cas,” Dean said in response, turning to face his blue-eyed angel. 

“You were thinking too hard,” Castiel said, trying for a smile and faltering. “Sam was worried about you.”

“Something you need to understand is that Sammy is always worried about something,” Dean said, scrubbing a hand across his face. “It’s who he is.”

Castiel nodded, understanding by now that this was more truth than lie. Something else he’d learned in his years with the Winchesters is that Sam rarely worried without provocation. “Is there something you’d like to talk about, Dean?”

He looked at Castiel for a moment, losing himself in the depths of those cool, blue eyes, before shaking himself back to reality. “No,” he said, despite there being a metric ton of shit he’d love to tell his trench coat wearing friend. Trouble was, now was not the time to be admitting to any of the thoughts whirling through his brain. 

“Sam says today is your father’s birthday,” Cas offered. As if that would get Dean talking. They both knew better. 

“Yeah,” Dean answered, kicking the dirt with his boot. Like he could ever forget his dad’s birthday. His mom’s. Sammy’s. Wait. “Cas, you have a birthday?”

“Me?” Castiel turned his eyes up towards the sky, watching the stars twinkle above him. “No. I – I was created and not born. It’s not the same thing.”

“No, I guess not,” Dean agreed. He looked at the ground, sighed, perked up. “We should give you one.”

“One what, Dean?”

“A birthday,” he said, warming to the idea, flushing all his dark thoughts down the drain for a moment. It wouldn’t last, but he needed something positive to cling to, even if it meant giving an angel a birthday.

Castiel attempted to smile again, succeeding, if the light in Dean’s eyes was any indication. “I do not need a birthday, I am content as I am.”

“Naw, man, we need a reason to celebrate,” Dean said.

“We can celebrate dad’s birthday,” Sam said, intruding on their private moment. 

“He’s dead, Sam,” Dean fired back, a sharp pain shooting through his chest. “It’s not the same.”

Sam shrugged. “Then we’ll celebrate cleaning up that nest of vampires outside of Toledo last week. And that shapeshifter down in Tulsa. Who needs a birthday? We’re lucky to survive day to day, waiting a year to celebrate is asking for trouble.”

“For once, you’re making some sense, Sammy,” Dean said, clapping his brother on the back. 

“I was about to go get something for dinner,” Sam said. “I guess I can go to the store instead. Bring back some hamburgers and chips.”

“And beer,” Dean added. “Don’t forget the beer.”

“Of course not,” Sam laughed. 

“Pie,” Castiel added. “Dean would also like some pie.”

Sam grinned. “Of course he does, he always wants pie. I’ll be back. Call if you think of anything else.”

They watched Sam get into the car and drive away. Castiel turned to Dean and touched his arm. “Dean,” he said, “I – never mind.”

“What?” He looked down at where Castiel’s fingers lingered on his skin, hating how much he hated it when they fell away. 

“It’s nothing.”

“Now you’re sounding like me,” Dean pointed out, both loving and hating the idea of his angel picking up his traits and claiming them. 

“Maybe you’re rubbing off on me,” Castiel said, shrugging. “It doesn’t matter anyway.”

“Why not?”

“Sam will be back soon and we’ll have our celebration,” he said, deflecting Dean’s question. But he couldn’t keep his eyes from wandering back to that face he knew so well, loved so much. If that’s what this even was, he reminded himself. Castiel wasn’t sure if angels could even feel love. 

“Yeah,” he said. “Maybe we ought to go inside, get some plates and things ready.”

“Bowls,” Castiel offered, tearing his eyes away from Dean’s handsome face. “For the chips. Sam said he was bringing chips.”

“He did,” Dean said. His fingers itched, twitched at the ends of his hands. Touching was okay for Cas, but it was a no-go for him. Touching meant feelings and feelings only led to bad things. He shoved his hands into his pockets, stuffing his unwelcome feelings into the linen with them. “C’mon, Cas, let’s go get this party started.”

Castiel nodded. Although Dean was correct about their need to let loose and celebrate, he was wrong in thinking that they needed a reason, an event, to do so. As far as he was concerned, Castiel believed that being together, being healthy and alive, was enough reason to have a party. He couldn’t tell Dean that, however, because that was too close to having emotions for the elder Winchester. So, he kept it to himself and followed Dean into the house. Sam would be back soon and they had a little work to do. There wasn’t much around to make the place look festive, but they could try.


End file.
